Negative Effects

DEAR FRIAR RICK: My mother comes from a very old, noble family. All her relatives were very good, hard working and highly moral, religious people. Throughout the family history there were many cases of tragic deaths, suicides, mental and physiological diseases (congenital cancer, depression), injustice, various failures and poverty. I have read that the family curse could cover even three generations, and that it can also be caused by a member of the family not blood related.

How is it possible to get ride of the family curse and turn it into a blessing?

 

As I read your note and the description of your mother’s family, I thought to myself, here is an eloquent summary of the reality of life; good people who so often have to face tremendous challenges. I felt that your mother’s family history was the story of every family. And then you surprised me!

The family curse! What? I can only imagine the degree of suffering that your family has endured that you would consider yourselves cursed. I’m sorry to hear that. I must admit that I’m not too sure what to make of the idea of a curse. In most cases when people thing of a curse they think of some mad witch or warlock ‘cursing’ us. In truth though, that would reveal a view of the world where Good and Evil are matched powers competing for domination over us. In fact there is only one power, and that is God. Evil, even when personified in the devil, is only a creature. The presence of evil is real and can mislead us. However we also need to be careful of not buying in to baseless superstitions.



Besides, what power can ultimately compete with the grace of Baptism and the abiding presence of the Holy Spirit in you or the wonderfully freeing blessing of Sacramental Reconciliation? What curse can possibly rival the blessing of regularly receiving the Body and Blood of Christ in the Eucharist? As the Catechism of the Catholic Church states about the devil: “He cannot prevent the building up of God’s reign” (#395).

Others see curses in the broader sense as the consequences of bad actions, either ours or of our ancestors. The Sacred Scriptures seem to point to this understanding, especially in the Book of Genesis, which gives explanations as to why there are hardships in life. And yes, the remnants of Original Sin do affect us, but so does God’s original Grace. Even in the Bible, the understanding of being cursed changes. Just look to Job and his plight. He does not believe that God has cursed him and refuses to reject God.



Really, what you seem to describe in your letter is not so much a curse, but rather the big question of suffering. Why do we suffer? Why do the innocent suffer? I’ll give you The Readers’ Digest answer: we don’t know. But we can begin to understand the meaning of suffering through our relationship with Jesus Christ. Here is the Lord of the Universe made flesh who suffers by our side. He takes upon Himself all of our suffering. If there ever was a curse on humanity, surely the Cross has annulled it! Jesus taught us to be faithful in love even when it seems all is going wrong. It couldn’t have looked any more hopeless for Jesus on the Cross. And yet, that sign of horror and punishment has become for us the sign of God’s victory over death!

I would like to suggest a very simple, thin book that might be helpful to you in your reflection. I Cry To You, O Lord: Scriptural Reflections on the Mystery and Meaning of Suffering by Jude Winkler, our own friar. This guide offers a great deal of wisdom and hope as we struggle with the reality of suffering in our lives.